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Post by bec2010 on Feb 8, 2011 20:36:42 GMT 1
Zara had tears streaming down her face; she never ever thought this day would happen. She felt an immense guilt that they hadn’t been able to reconcile properly and that she hadn’t been at his side when he needed her the most. She thought back and thought of all the happy memories they had shared, although worn with time and not a lot of them were frequent, they were still happy times and times she would treasure for the rest of her life. “Alex your eulogy was so moving, it really described your father well, and you delivered it with such passion. He would be and still is so proud of his “Alex” Aunty Gwen said whilst clutching her nieces hand so tightly “Aunty Gwen, its Zara now! But thank you and thank you for coming” Zara uttered through gritted teeth, her eyes full of tears and trying to keep composed. A procession of people walked past Zara, each of them greeting her with a memory of Jed and complimenting her on her eulogy. Aunty Joan boomed over, a rather larger than life lady “Zara; my darling. Your speech was so moving; it summed Jed up so well, such a brilliant man! But although my darling you for filled his every ambition for you, there is one thing he wanted for you to have more than anything, a child. Well your cousins tell me about your “reputation” so I would have thought you would have found a man and settled with child by now?” Zara didn’t even bother answering the question, her composed and blank expression turned to a crumpled face and she burst into tears. Zara had never told Jed about her not being able to conceive, he always had an inkling and told her not to leave it too late with her mother going through the menopause early, but she dismissed his suggestions and that she was fine. She remembered to herself a conversation she had with him over the phone when she and Daniel were serious, asking her if she had any plans of becoming pregnant because he wanted to meet his grandchild and prepare it for a life with Zara, as he used like mother, like daughter. She laughed a little at this memory. Zara made her excuses that she had to go but it was lovely to see everyone, quickly rushing towards the waiting funeral car, opening the door and sitting down. She knew this was the time it was going to hit her, now that everyone had gone and there was no more rushing around she could do to prepare things, at least there would be one thing she could return to normal, work. She had told nobody at the Mill that Jed had died, just making the excuse that she was going to stay with her cousin, Kay in Scotland because Kay was going through difficult times. The funeral car drove Zara back to her house, around an hours journey and Zara opened her front door, looking around, several bunches of flowers all with the message “with deepest sympathy for your loss” off various members of family that really in Zara’s opinion didn’t care really, just cared for show. She laid out her suit for work and cleaned a pair of red very high court shoes, she would mean business tomorrow, but for tonight she threw on a pair of sweat pants and a hoodie that Daniel had left, curling up on the sofa with a bottle of wine. After drinking a few glasses, Zara felt extremely emotional and she was starting to become drunk, she decided it was time to put it away and curling up further on the sofa, eventually falling asleep.
The next morning Zara woke up with a slight headache but was relieved that she thought she could grasp a piece of normality back in returning to work, no sympathy or gushing exactly what she thought she needed. She showered and went to put her work clothes on, she decided on a black lace top and grey pencil skirt with stockings alongside her red shoes. She applied her make up rather heavily and glossed her lips several times with bright red lipstick, pulling her hair up loosely. She decided she was returning to the old Zara today, no slight hint of emotion just pure bluntness and honesty.
Pulling into the staff car park, she pulled up alongside Daniels car; he was also getting out of his car. “Morning Miss Carmichael, nice holiday with your cousin?” Daniel was rather taken aback by Zara’s appearance, she looked extremely hot and he could help but stare Flashing a cheeky smile back at him, but really wanting to burst into tears, he drove her into madness at times, but she still loved him and she longed to tell him what had happened and for him to comfort her. Daniel stood to the spot, staring as she walked into reception with a pleased look on his face. “That woman never fails to amaze me Dr Grainger, where does she think she works a well-respected doctor’s surgery or a bordello! I think Mrs Parsons needs to have a word with her about her appearance, she is so unprofessional and upfront” Mrs Tembe said with such anger Daniel smirked “Personally I don’t think there is anything wrong with Zara’s upfront” “Dr Grainger! You are meant to be a settled man, living with your child and the mother of your child, that is sinful enough that you are not married, but lusting after another woman, that is adultery and you are breaking one of the ten commandments, you disgust me” With that Mrs Tembe walked off tutting and shaking her head.
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Post by bec2010 on Feb 8, 2011 21:18:07 GMT 1
Zara was glad she had patients all morning, it kept her busy and her mind occupied, ever so often she felt herself glaring over to the picture she had framed on her desk, a photo of her and Jed taken when she was about 21, when life was perfect, before any thoughts of prison. Just her and her “Daddy” Zara barley even recognised herself, the girl in the picture had long light brown hair with blonde highlights, she had a brilliant white smile and her eyes sparkled, it mostly screamed Pre Ian, before he had destroyed her father’s life, but mostly her life. She was never a “Man seeking missile” or “cold” or “heartless” until he had blackmailed casual sex with her, up until then Zara had never really been with someone and had only slept with one person, and that was in her last year of sixth form with a family friend, a person who was like a brother to Zara. Rather shocking for a woman who now doesn’t trust men and has lost count with the amount she has picked up and dropped. She hated herself for it but what’s the point in settling down with anyone whilst the man of your dreams, the only man you have loved is playing happy families with another woman and well you cannot have children anyway. A heavy knock on the door “Come in” Zara uttered “Free for a chat” Daniel took a seat “You have to be kidding with me Daniel; I’m so busy and have a mountain of work to do before lunch” Daniel looked hurt, he knew Zara could be cold but she practically bit his head off and well he thought they were friends. “Oh” Daniel looked down at the floor “Okay I suppose I could spare 5 minutes” Zara not wanting to hurt his feelings because really she wanted to reach out to him and spill her heart “So how was your 10 day off, did you manage to sort Kay out? I’ve missed you, Mrs Tembe has been on better than top form and well I don’t have my partner in crime” Daniel teased Zara couldn’t help herself, she welled up with tears, trying to tilt her head back and stop them running down her face and turning her chair away from Daniel “Oh Zara, what’s wrong? Placing his hand on her thigh and with the other reaching for her hand “Nothing, I’m fine” Zara sniffled back “It’s just … Its Just personal issues” Finishing rather sharply “Zara you know I’m always going to be here for you, and well please tell me, I want to help you” Daniel replied, moving his hand further up her thigh and his hand that was holding her hand onto her face, pulling her head into his “Daniel, please stop! You can do nothing to help, unless you’re a miracle worker and can bring people back from the dead” Zara instantly regretted what she had just said “Zara, who’s died?” Daniel tilting her head up, so that she was looking directly in his eyes “My Daddy” Zara whispered Daniel pulled back for a moment looking at Zara in shock, he couldn’t believe she had told nobody and was going through this on her own. He leant back into Zara, moving his hand from her thigh so he now had two hands on her face, pulling her into him and kissing her lips. He was glad Zara had this office, she had no windows and her blind that was a wall, was always firmly shut, he didn’t care about Lisa, nothing but Izzy was more important than Zara at this point in time. He took his suit jacket off, still firmly attached to Zara’s lips and picked her up, wrapping her legs around his waist. She pulled back off his lips for a second “Daniel we cannot do this” whilst Daniel walked over to Zara’s office door and locked it. He dismissed Zara and moved back to kissing her, she didn’t pull back instead wrapping her arms around his neck. He placed her on the couch, Zara knew this was sympathy sex, but at the same time it was exactly what she wanted and didn’t make Daniel stop.
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Post by bec2010 on Feb 8, 2011 21:46:58 GMT 1
Zara put her skirt back on and pulled down her ruffled top, composing herself back to looking normal whilst Daniel tucked his shirt back into his suit pants. He pulled Zara into him and kissed her forehead “Feel any better” Daniel asked “Daniel you are so shallow, it was sex, and it’s not a miracle cure, it’s not going to bring my father back from the dead and it’s not going to mend my heart, and heal the pain inside. Just get away from me, you are so self-centred and what have I done just hurt myself even more” Zara started shouting “Zara keep your voice down” Daniel replied “Unless you want them all to find out we have just had sex, and well we will both loose our jobs and you will earn yourself an even better reputation” Zara slapped Daniel “You are nothing but a joke! How could I ever find myself in love with you and me, me earn the reputation you have got to be kidding, you’ve got red lipstick all over your face and it’s not Lisa’s, point proven” “In love with me, the only person you can ever love Zara is yourself, and well you’re like putty in my hands, Zara Carmichael the sl*t for Daniel Grainger. I come to you in your hour of need and you cannot wait to get into my trousers” “Oh I am many things Daniel, a sl*t maybe but I’m faithful in a relationship and I don’t cheat on the woman I am supposed to be in love with. Hello I’m Daniel Grainger and I have no brain, I just think with my penis, as soon a bit of cleavage is shown and a short shirt is worn, I’m there” “Bit of cleavage and a short shirt, Zara you couldn’t have shown more today if you tried, funny way of grieving, if that is actually true or you were so desperate for the best sex you have ever had and just played the sob card” “I’m not as sick as you to even think I have made this up, my daddy was my everything. Don’t make me laugh Daniel, now get out and I never want to see your face, ever and I mean ever again” Zara opening the door with force, revealing a shocked Lisa and Mrs Tembe outside
“Well done Daniel” Zara looked at him with disgust “Lisa, I can explain I’m sorry. It’s her, it’s all her fault. I love you” Daniel pleaded “Adultery, Doctor Grainger is committed by two people, not just one” Mrs Tembe added in, with a waving finger “Lisa, I’m sorry, I love you and Izzy” Daniel shouted “Daniel, I’m actually not surprised, have your whore, and to think I trusted you Zara, but your nothing more than a sex mad sl*t, look at what you’re wearing, you could be mistaken for a prostitute, and to think you were anywhere near Izzy, you make me feel sick” Zara visibly hurt by this comment sank to the floor and buried her head in her hands “Daniel don’t even bother, I’m going to make sure you never ever see Izzy again and to think I thought we were going well, well Daniel I’m 2 months pregnant and I don’t want you anywhere near this child either, expect to hear from my solicitor about payment arrangements” With that Lisa walked off, Daniel shouting after her and punching the wall. Zara stood back up to her feet, now all the doctors were watching, both feeling a great deal of anger and embarrassment. “My office now, both of you” Julia bellowed.
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Post by bec2010 on Feb 8, 2011 22:53:55 GMT 1
“What do you think this is? You’re Bedroom” Julia shouted, although Julia got angry neither had seen Julia this cross before. At that moment Heston walked in, appearing more calm and level headed “You two are lucky that we had no patients in the practice, else this would have been instant dismissal and I would have to have reported you both to the GMC. What do you think you are both playing at? Risking your careers and you both being partners, fine example to other members of staff! What for, a 10 minute bunk up in the office, as much as this doesn’t surprise me I expected more from both of you!” Heston added Zara burst out crying, and if it was anyone else Julia would have demanded that she turn the water works off but with it being Zara, showing emotion was near impossible and for her to cry something must be wrong. “Heston, would you take Daniel into your office please” Heston and Daniel left the room “So Zara, please if there is a reason for today’s actions please explain it” Zara composed herself “Breathe a word of any of this to anyone else Julia and I swear” “You swear nothing Zara, I don’t think this is the situation where you hold any power over me, what your about to tell me better be the whole truth and if I found out your lying this is all over” Zara had nothing to lose, opening up and spilling her heart could cause her no more trouble than she is in now. She explained about her mother dying, her relationship with her father, being used for sex by Ian, the man she really wanted to be with dying in the fire, the struggle of becoming a doctor, her father being sent to prison, her relationship with Daniel, not being able to have children, saving Izzy, Daniel leaving her, revenge on Ian and well her father dying. Zara had said it, the first time she had spilled her heart out and she now felt totally vulnerable. Julia was taken aback by what Zara had said, although this was no excuse for her actions, it explained a lot and she went over to give a slumped Zara a hug. “Zara by all means do not think you are off the hook but I cannot believe you have managed this all to yourself, and well it obviously has contributed” Zara looking up uttering “Sorry, I’m a mess, I don’t even recognise myself” Julia remembering how much Zara has changed and how she has helped Julia many times, felt compassion towards Zara and in fact this explained everything that Zara was just a little girl using adult things to cover up the fact that she is scared and is broken.
Julia brought Heston back into the room along with Daniel. They left Daniel and Zara on their own and left the room to make a decision about the Doctors future. Daniel turned to Zara, she looked like a frightened and an alone child, she really did have nothing left “I’m sorry” Daniel looked at Zara “I was horrible and well it’s not excusable, I’m sorry for your father dying but this cannot go on, this me and you on and off, I think it’s best if we just have nothing to do with each other and don’t work together” before Daniel could finish Julia and Heston walked back in the room. “Okay, we would like to say that we are being very light on you, we could make this a whole lot worse, but we have come to the decision that both of you will receive a written warning and that we will try and work the rota where one of you works at the campus full time, and with respect to being partners I hope you can behave with maturity and co-operate together” Zara looked at Daniel “I’m Sorry” She then looked at Heston and Julia “I’m sorry, you have done nothing but treat us two with the upmost respect in a very immature situation created by me and Daniel, however as kind as you are being, I have decided I want to sell my partnership and move on from the Mill and Letherbridge and I’m not even sure if I want to be a Doctor anymore” Neither Daniel, Julia and Heston were expecting this change of heart from Zara, they were all gobsmacked, they at least expected a fight from her but she simply just gave up.
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Post by bec2010 on Feb 9, 2011 0:32:28 GMT 1
Julia dismissed Daniel letting him go and find Lisa, only because she wanted him to salvage a relationship with Izzy. “Zara I hope this isn’t a rash decision and just a knee jerk to today’s events” Heston added “No, I’ve been thinking about it since my father died and well my family have delivered a few home truths and after today’s events I know what people including Daniel think of me, so Letherbridge is not a place to stay, I should have moved all those years ago” Zara felt unnatural opening up to people “As long as your totally sure Zara there is nothing we can to do to stop you but we think it is a ridiculous decision, you’re a brilliant doctor and well a good friend to us all, everybody can use a bit of bluntness from time to time, but during my illness, you showed such an amazing side Zara and you were there for me” Zara felt that this was a place she belonged, but it was her own fault that she had to leave and she accepted that “Okay Zara if you want to leave, we will let you off with the weeks’ notice, for you’re and Daniels sake, a temp will be found as soon as you give direction and with regards to the partnership, we will have to have a partners meeting involving Daniel, we will then have to keep your partner money until you find a buyer, however I do have a buyer in mind” Heston added “Okay, but I don’t think I want to sell my partnership just hand the title over to someone else, maybe Elaine. I still want this place to remain special to me, just for me not to be here” Zara added “It’s up to you, but we will sort it all Zara, we just all hope this isn’t some self-destruction mode you’re on, because at the end of the day using your blunt style; we know your life is terrible but Daniel is just a man at the end of the day, you cope with grief eventually and this will all be forgotten” Julia added with sympathy “No I’ve made up my mind; I think I’m going to stay with Ruth for a while. Learn some new qualifications, find out what I really want from life and discover “Alex” again.
Zara stood up from the chair and went to her office; she gathered all of her stuff and her mug from the staff room, putting everything into a box and took it out to her car. She took one last look at the Mill and drove off to her house. Opening the door, she looked around, this was for sure the right thing, and she took several bin bags and worked her way through the house, clearing and tidying plus packing for America. She decided her house would remain empty while she was away, Julia coming to check every few days that everything was okay, but she was going to put sell her car to the local garage tomorrow afternoon. She couldn’t believe that this was what she was actually doing but after everything that had happened she was going to go back to being “Alex” Pressing submit on her ticket confirmation this was it, she was going to America and was hoping to shake the Zara label once and for all.
Zara had the partners meeting in the morning and had sold her car in the afternoon, binning her phone on the way into the terminal, this was it, a fresh start.
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Post by bec2010 on Feb 9, 2011 18:14:21 GMT 1
Julia logged onto Skype and Ruth was waiting online for her “Julia I’ve missed talking to you! It’s been ages, but sorry I’ve been really busy and I haven’t had any internet access for a few weeks, but anyway how are you, how is everyone?” “Oh don’t be silly I understand how busy you must have been, The Mill has been crazy too. I’m fine, just very tired, we have been having a bit of revamp, nothing too drastic just a little lick of paint and some new furniture, but other than that I am fine. Yes everybody is okay, the new doctor has settled in well, a rather plump woman, middle aged, around 50, a lovely woman but very much keeps herself to herself but I’m sure she will feel more a part of the team soon. Oh and well the usual suspects, Cherry and Jimmi are going great, from strength to strength, we all recon that they will have some big news to announce to us soon, either that they are getting married or having a baby, it’s so lovely to see them both happy. Heston is fine, having a small midlife crisis, he has just bought a brand new sports car and a new trendy apartment, and he thinks change is key, one of the reasons for the refit. Simon is well Simon, still struggling but eventually decided that staying at the Mill was what he wanted and he is making real progress. Elaine is Elaine. Oh and Mrs Tembe, you know the woman I was telling you about, well she seems to have settled herself, calmed down after her telling off over the whole Zara and Daniel situation” Ruth interrupted “So how is Daniel?” “Is Zara with you?” Julia asked “No she’s at the clinic with Joe, won’t be in for a while, and before you say it I promise I won’t say anything to her, bar your all fine” “Well, Daniel, he’s had a rough past few weeks. I think although he said those things to Zara during their argument, he was shocked that she left and seemed a bit hurt but that isn’t the worst of his troubles” Ruth prompted Julia for more “Well you know after the whole thing, he chased Lisa for weeks and they eventually got back together, well personally I think he only wanted her back for Izzy. But they got back together and well he seemed so miserable but totally clingy to Izzy it was just so unlike him and well then it happened, Lisa lost the baby” “Oh I’ve never been her biggest fan, but that’s terrible” Ruth added “Well Daniel initially didn’t show much emotion, seemed very cold and very distanced. Although he didn’t say it, you could actually tell how much he wanted that baby, I don’t know maybe because it would have been a proper brother or sister for Izzy. You could tell Daniel wasn’t getting much sleep and he appeared tired, eventually ending up at Jimmi’s with Izzy. He told Jimmi that him and Lisa had argued ever since she had lost the baby, that it was all Zara’s fault and that Lisa couldn’t cope, saying that she didn’t have a special bond with Izzy like she did with the miscarried one. Daniel then returned home the next morning, to find the whole house trashed and Lisa’s things all gone, with a note that she had left for good. Daniel saw no point in chasing her and well he’s now a single dad, but coping very well and is being very mature, something I wouldn’t class Daniel as” “Oh, Bless him” Ruth exclaimed “I’m glad though that he has stepped up to the role of father though and not trying to offload her” Julia interrupted “Anyway enough with Daniel, How is Zara?” Ruth looked very hesitant and looked around behind her before she began “Well she is like a totally different person, its good in a way but I miss the old Zara so much. I’ll send you a picture of me and her from yesterday” Julia opened the picture; the woman in front of her looked very different to Zara. She had a tan, put on a little bit of weight (only about half a stone) had long blonde/brown hair and a brilliant smile on her face. “Gosh Ruth, it’s like looking at a different person. She looks very happy though and well it looks like she has found the real her or however she put it” “I know, She has changed so much, I’m not kidding you Julia in the three months she has been here I really don’t think she has slept with anyone! She has men swooning around her at the clinic but she shows no interest and the guy she went on a date with went no further. Her clothes, no more serious Zara, she often wears Jeans, Baggy Tops, Hoodies and Flip Flops. She loves being a researcher at the centre and still runs a few clinics, oh and she’s teaching at Boston University too. She is like the best friend every girl wants, but I do miss the old Zara, telling us stories of all her men and her antics, her blunt attitude and her extravagant clothes. “No Way” Julia exclaimed “So...So...Does that mean we’ve lost Zara to Boston for good?” Ruth looked around, hearing a small noise in the background “Well this was meant to be a surprise, and you promise that you won’t tell anybody at all please Julia? “Promise” “Well Me and Zara are coming back to England for good, Joe has decided between me and Zara, along with a few others we are going to open the new research centre in England, we were both a little dubious at first but I think were both going to love it, and well the best part is that it only going to be 30 minutes from the Mill, so we can visit you and visa/versa” “Oh Ruth that is brilliant, I’ve missed you both so much! And wow what an opportunity Joe has given you both! I cannot wait to see you both, when do you come home then?” “A week tomorrow, me and Zara are going to live in her house and well hopefully England will bring back a little of the old Zara” Ruth heard footsteps in the back ground and Julia heard a knock on her door. Zara appeared at the webcam with Ruth and Daniel walked in with Mrs Tembe, walking over to the webcam. “Hello everyone” Smiled Zara, waving and flashing a beautiful white smile, whilst wearing a white vest top and baggy jeans which highlighted her tan “Hey, you look amazing” Julia exclaimed “Dr Carmichael, you look very healthy and happy, more natural than a woman in the bordello of a few months ago. You also appear to have gained a little weight, America, the land of the fast food” Mrs Tembe finished with a tut “Oh Mrs Tembe, I don’t think it’s fast food, just I’m not getting my regular exercise, if you get what I mean “ The old Zara suddenly appeared, Ruth and Julia loving it and Daniel bursting into laugher. “Zara… you look… really… well. I love your hair, I always loved it lighter. I guess what I’m trying to say, well, I’m glad that you happy and I hope we can both be mature adults and be friends” Mrs Tembe walked from the room in disgust and Julia turned to face him, Ruth doing the same to Zara. “Thank you. I hope life too is treating you well, that you have managed to sort things with Lisa and your looking forward to your new child. Of course we can be friends, Daniel I don’t regret any of this for one second and as much as it kills me, it was the best sex of my life. It showed me that I had to change and there was more to life than the way I was living” More of the old Zara returning and the chemistry building between the pair. “I’m glad, but well the last few months haven’t been a bed of roses. I got back with Lisa, she lost the baby, she walked out and here I am, a single father” Zara answered with a simple “Oh, sorry” Ruth and Julia interrupted the moment “We both have to go, bye, love you all” and ended the Skype conversation
“Julia, I really miss her” Daniel looked upset “Well I’m not actually sure what I feel, maybe I’m just jealous that she has found what she wants in life, and well she reminds me so much of the Zara that only I used to know, the one I only used to see behind closed doors, the vulnerable, happy and emotion capable Zara. Or it might be the fact that I’m just lonely, Izzy isn’t sleeping and well I don’t know, maybe I miss having a woman” Daniel leant into Julia for a hug “Promise you won’t say anything, but she’s coming back next week” This added a smile to Daniels face.
Ruth looked at Zara, who had a slight stream of tears running down her face “Ruth, I miss him and just looking at him, I totally want to be with him but he just doesn’t look interested, I don’t know if I even want to go back to England, I’m happy here, I want to stay. How can I go up to him after everything he has been through, tell him I love him still, the real me wants to be with him, and well he’s struggling with Izzy, just lost a baby. So how do I go up to him and tell he is going to be a dad, that my tablets somehow made me conceive and a quick romp in the office has made me pregnant, and I’m not just a few days or weeks, I’m thirteen weeks, my baby is fully formed and is now growing into a proper little human being, Ruth how do I tell him? Do I tell him?” Zara started crying.
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Post by bec2010 on Feb 9, 2011 19:42:06 GMT 1
“Zara you cannot not tell him, it’s his child, you both were involved in the act that got that baby inside you Zara” Ruth exclaimed “And do you not think for one minute if I thought I was going to end up pregnant, I would have made him wear something or me took something, no Ruth because as far as I was concerned I was a dried up old woman. Anyway it was sympathy sex, and from his reaction to us being caught he had no feelings for me, he just wanted sex, a way to try and show his sympathy” Zara exclaimed Ruth hugged Zara “Thank god, we have the old Zara back” Zara giggled “Ruth this isn’t the time for joking what am I going to do, it’s getting harder and harder to hide this lump on the front of me, I love it with all my heart but I couldn’t bear it if its daddy rejected it or wanted me to get rid of it” Zara started to cry “Zara, I love you so much, you’re my best friend in the entire world, and you being super perfect Zara have killed me. But hopefully England will bring some feisty spirit back to you, and the old Zara would just tell it straight and whoever didn’t like it could lump it” Ruth giggled and hugged Zara.
It was the night before she and Ruth were leaving for England, Zara logged onto her old Facebook account, something she hadn’t looked at for 3 months or more. Logging on there was a few inbox messages, just silly ones from Michelle sending her jokes and pictures of Afghanistan, but obviously gathered by the last message and the same no reply, Zara didn’t use Facebook anymore. Zara decided she would upload a few photos to Facebook of her time in America, some of the sights she had seen, pictures of herself and the people she had met. As soon as they were uploaded, Daniel started commenting on your photos. Zara had uploaded a photo of Ruth completely hammered on one of their night outs, Daniel leaving the comment “I’ve never been to America, But I have seen many states” Zara burst out laughing, it was a stupid thing she and Daniel read on Facebook when they were together and they had used the term ever since. Daniel must have started to look through Zara’s photos a few notifications came up, and she did the same to his. “A beautiful picture, cannot believe how much Izzy has grown, you must be so proud of her” “This is my favourite photo of you and you Dad, Zar! He would be so proud” They kept looking and Zara found a photo of herself on Daniels Facebook, it was of when they were going out and they had been to a charity ball, and Zara had got so drunk Daniel had to carry her home. The photo was of Zara pulling such a stupid face whilst trying to stay stood up, whilst Daniel had his arms around her waist, half cuddling her and half propping her up. “I’m in America, and this should be made one of the official states” Daniel found this comment hilarious and instead of typing something jokey back, he typed “I miss you” Zara was taken aback with this comment, instantly replying “I’ll inbox you, miss you too”
Zara sent Daniel an inbox simply reading “I love you, miss you. I’m pregnant. Congratulations Daddy” Zara refreshed her profile after a minute expecting a reply back; instead when she tried to click on Daniels profile again, she found the account had been deactivated. What had she done, she knew she should have trusted her conscience and not told him, this was all a disaster. Zara burst out crying.
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Post by bec2010 on Feb 9, 2011 22:23:15 GMT 1
“Julia, Julia, Its…me…me…Daniel” Shouting down the phone “Daniel…what…Its 3:05am, you have to be kidding me or this better be important” Julia replied with more than a hint of annoyance “It’s Zara…Zara…Well…Julia I don’t know” Daniel mumbled several more things, but Julia couldn’t hear him. Julia sat bolt upright “What’s happened to Zara? Daniel…Daniel are you there? “Julia it’s all a mess. I’ve just been talking to her on Facebook, and well I told her I missed her, although I’m not sure how I feel, I cannot bear to be without her but at the same time I don’t know if I want a relationship or if I do love her, I’m so confused. And well then she messaged me beck saying she loved me and missed me and that well…well… that afternoon like….well three months ago… you know after we had sex…like we didn’t use anything…and well Zara’s somehow…although I don’t know but she’s pregnant and its mine” Julia rubbed her eyes she couldn’t figure if this was a dream or not “I thought Zara couldn’t conceive and well Daniel you need to make up your mind how you feel, so what you said back?” “I deactivated my account, I’m scared, Julia I want another chance with her but I don’t know if it can work with a baby, I mean, me, her, Izzy and a baby hardly the conventional nuclear family, what do you say to that. The amount of times we have had sex and well this has never happened before, and how could she be pregnant, like she’s going through the menopause, Julia what to do” Daniel clearly sounding distressed on the phone. “Calm down Daniel, okay you had sex and well now there is baby involved but somehow you’ve managed with Izzy and that’s worked out. I think you really need to decide what you want with Zara, how you feel for and send her a long message back, but insist on picking her up from the airport and talk about this whole situation” Julia tried to reassure Daniel, but he was having none of it.
“Ruth…Ruth…Ruth…Wake up, I need you” Zara bursting into Ruth’s room “Whoa, Zara, what’s up, is it the baby” Ruth sitting bolt upright and full of concern Zara burst out crying “I’ve told Daniel and he deactivated his account” Ruth hugged Zara “You silly woman what were you doing telling him over Facebook anyway” “I don’t know, I got lost in the moment, he told me he missed me and well I told him I missed his back and then it just spilled out about me being pregnant, I don’t want to go to England” “No way missy, don’t even dare think about backing out now and it’s too late anyway, we have to catch this flight in 4 hours” “I’m scared Ruth” Zara cried
The flight seemed to take forever, Zara reading several Magazines; Cosmopolitan had an article on being a single mother. Zara really thought hard into this article, this was all she had wanted for the past year to be a mother and finally her dream was happening, just not the way she wanted, she thought to herself could she cope as a single mother and would it be better just to abort the child, if it wasn’t going to be loved by its daddy, but looking down to a little curve she knew that wasn’t an option. Eventually touching down in West Midlands Airport, Zara felt sick, not just morning sickness but this was it, time to face up to the future. No more nice Zara, No more nasty Zara only Mummy Zara. She had remained silent to Ruth throughout the flight, although Ruth kept shooting her reassuring glances. Waiting for her baggage was like hell, why had she returned, if she had just stayed in America, she could have just had this baby and Daniel would have been none of the wiser, why was she so stupid. Walking through arrivals, she spotted a familiar face Julia, thank god but standing next to Julia was Daniel, Zara wanted to turn around and wait until they had left “Too late, they have seen you” Ruth exclaimed Zara taking a deep breath stood back into the revolving doors, this was it, this was her future. Nothing could have prepared her for what happened next, as soon as she walked out of the arrivals revolving doors, Daniel came running up to her, picking her up and wrapping her legs around his waist, stroking her hair and rubbing her back “I love you” Daniel whispered in her ear
Julia and Ruth looked on “Okay we will just leave now, we will see you both later at the Mill” Julia shouted She got no response from either Zara or Daniel still wrapped up in the embrace. “Daniel, I love you too” Zara kissed his cheek “All this soul searching and I discovered a lot about myself but I couldn’t change the fact that I love you nor that I want to be with you, no matter how hard I tried” Daniel placed Zara back down, and they walked hand in hand to the car, getting in, driving home in silence and opening Daniels front door.
“Okay were having this discussion now” Daniel said with an upmost urgency “When did you find out you were pregnant, how are you pregnant” “Oh Daniel, do you need a diagram” Zara said rather sarcastically, Daniel wasn’t impressed “Okay, well last week, I was feeling really tired and well if it isn’t obvious that I’ve put on weight, I went to see Joe, who thought I could have an infection or a thyroid problem, so he took a series of bloods and urine samples and rang my clinic back over here to see if there was any medication that could cause this, in case it was a reaction or was causing me damage. Well he called me back after a good few hours, and he told me then that I was pregnant, that the drug I was on at the time had caused me to ovulate and somehow it attached itself onto a very thin womb lining, meaning that I was pregnant although it is extremely uncommon” “So is it what you want, have you have had a scan? Is everything okay?” Zara stood up feeling rather insulted “Of course it’s what I want, I’ve been blessed with a child when I thought I couldn’t conceive and well what do you want Daniel because I’m not getting rid of it” Zara was shaking; Daniel stood up pulling Zara towards him and placed her hands into his hands, placing them on her almost invisible bump. Zara knew what this mean, she leant into him and kissed him, he kissing her back and moving his hands to her face and her neck. The kissing grew more intense, the passion and chemistry between the pair added fuel to the fire and the sexual tension between them obvious. She unbuttoned his shirt and he undid the buttons and zip on her jeans, both falling back onto the sofa.
Zara awoke to find her and Daniel on the sofa, naked bar a blanket covering them. She loved the feeling of someone being so close, she felt so secure and warm. Daniel woke up and smiled at Zara “It’s strange seeing you with a bump” Daniel whispered Now that Zara was naked and she was close to him, he could see and feel the bump, it was all very real. “Daniel what are we going to do about us” Zara looked at him seriously “If I wasn’t pregnant would you want to be with me and if Lisa was still pregnant, you wouldn’t want to be with me would you?
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Post by bec2010 on Feb 10, 2011 23:29:37 GMT 1
“Zara, I cannot believe you’re even bringing her into this” Daniel said stroking her face Zara pushed his hand away and getting up of the sofa, starting to put her clothes back on “No Daniel, what would you have done?” “I would have…well I don’t know, well what does it matters were not in that situation are we?” Daniel replied trying to reach out to Zara “You are unbelievable Daniel, No, I can actually believe this coming from you, well I can tell you exactly what you would have done, you would have stayed with Lisa for Izzy sake, or well that’s what you claim, and you would have pushed it along until we both had the babies and then played happy families with each of us” Zara was really angry “Calm down, please” Daniel pleaded “It’s your hormones” “My hormones, don’t be stupid Daniel” “Zara, I don’t care at all about Lisa and well were not in that situation are we. No so be mature about it” “Mature about this! Daniel Grainger holding the moral high ground! No Daniel I’ll be mature about this, we are going to be parents in 26 weeks, and well I don’t want a relationship, I just want you there for this baby” “You don’t want a relationship, sorry but who has just jumped straight back into bed with me and who told me they loved me last night, oh and today as well” “Daniel I love you, but I love our baby more, and well us having sex here and there, deciding we will be together, then having a massive argument, that’s not going to be healthy for this baby, I could have totally put up with it, but I’m not putting my child through that!” “So it’s your child now Zara, really, well the last time I checked two people had to have sex to produce a baby so no Zara it’s not just your baby, it’s our baby” “Okay our baby, do you not what is the best for our baby” “Yes Zara, and that is with us being together, a child needs its mother and its father, you out of all people should know how important having a father in your life is, if it wasn’t for your “Daddy” we wouldn’t even be in this situation” “Don’t even bring my daddy into this, grow up! Daniel we need to sort this whole situation out, we need to be mature and sit down and discuss this, were in our 30’s Daniel not our teens” “Okay, right so if we are not going to be together, where is the baby going to live? Who is going to name it? Access? Christmas? Birthdays? Don’t be so silly Zara, we need to be together!” Zara burst out crying, tilting her head back and putting her hands over her face “Zara I love you, please stay, please give us a chance” Zara suddenly gripped her tiny bump “Ouch, oww” Zara and Daniel both looked down and covering Zara’s jeans was a large patch of blood “Daniel, help me” Zara collapsing to the ground.
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Post by bec2010 on Feb 13, 2011 0:05:52 GMT 1
“Okay Miss Carmichael” the sonographer placing a cold jelly lubricant on her Zara’s belly Zara couldn’t stop crying and was clinging onto Daniels hand, Daniel couldn’t even look Zara in the eye he felt so guilty, if he hadn’t carried on the argument, they might not have been in this situation. “Miss Carmichael, I know this is hard but can you please keep still” The sonographer rubbed the probe over Zara’s bump several times until it came to rest in one position “Woosssssshhhhh” “Woooosssssshhh” “It’s good news Miss Carmichael, your foetus has a very strong heartbeat, and everything seems okay, can you see there its head, its arms, legs and there is its little heart. Right so this foetus is around 14-15 weeks old, have you booked your UK appointments with your midwife and your scans?” Zara couldn’t speak for tears of relief, and Daniel had tears rolling down his face. He grabbed Zara’s hand so tight and smiled at her, she made the effort of forcing a little smile back. “No I’ve booked no appointments” Zara stuttered “Miss Carmichael don’t be so worried, it’s common for women to experience a little bleeding but in my personal opinion I want to keep a closer eye on you, having more scans than a regular pregnancy, regular bloods and check up’s, ill sort that out for you. I’ll send you a letter and I’ll get the midwife to visit in a few days. In the meantime ill print a few scan pictures off for you both”
Zara still lying on the table and Daniel sitting in the chair, both holding the scan picture and studying it very closely “Hello baby Grainger” Zara speaking to the photograph Daniel looked up and smiled, he kissed her hand “You’re right Daniel if we are going to have to be together for the sake of this baby, but we need to sort several things out such as jobs, houses, lifestyle and buying things, being a proper couple, not just bed partners” Daniel stood up off the seat, and hugged Zara. “Zara I want to give you this” Daniel produced a ring box from his pocket “I decided I was going to propose to you and I got my Gran’s ring before I came to pick you up this morning, but I’ve decided now I’m not going to propose, well I am going to propose but this is to show you commitment, that I am going to try and hopefully make this work, that I will be here for you and I’ll do anything for our family. So do you accept?” Zara started crying “I do, this is going to cause a lot of changes to a lot of plans, but I do”
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