Post by lemonpig on Nov 20, 2009 12:32:38 GMT 1
This is my second fanfic which was in fact written first. It's a short story that not everyone will like. Thanks for taking the time to read it. Any feedback is welcome.
As usual, a big thank you to Bella for correcting my English and being patient with me. And God knows she has to be! ;D
Afternoon surgery had seemed to drag on forever. Nick did not have any cancellations and he could not enjoy more than a five-minute break. Even worse, Vivien had booked in some extra patients for him. Deep inside he knew that it was only fair, to his patients and colleagues alike, as he had been away earlier in the afternoon and would be again tomorrow. He did not really mind as long as it enabled him to have the following day off. Inbetween patients and their numerous aches and pains, Nick just hoped that his luck would not leave him. His life was now back on track, both on a personal and professional level, and he intended to do whatever it would take to keep it that way. At that precise moment, the idea of George smiling when she would see him walk into the staff room sprang into his mind. He quickly dismissed the image as he needed to stay focused on the task at hand. George would see him walk, just not yet. She would be relieved of her guilt, he swore to himself. This was part of his motivation. Nick would never admit it to George of course, or anyone else for that matter, but her guilty feelings had started to make him feel uneasy. Not guilty in turn, just uneasy. He hated to see George so miserable. He craved for the return of the gorgeous, sparkling George whom he loved so much. This had kept him going in his bleakest hours.
The ride home was one of Nick’s favourite times for thinking. Those minutes were his and his only. No interruptions of any kind: no colleagues, no patients, no need to pay attention to what was going on on the road as he was no longer a driver, no chit chat from the cabby. It was just him and his thoughts. The image of George was still present in his mind. No matter how hard he tried, he could not stop thinking about her. He loved her, always had and always would. Ronnie was the luckiest man on earth but he did not seem to realise it. Nick envied him: he would do anything, absolutely anything at all, to get a woman like George. Sadness cast a shadow over Nick’s face. Women... He did not know any woman crazy enough to choose a cripple for boyfriend. The idea seemed ludicrous. Women were nothing but a faint memory now. How long had it been since Gabby had left him ? He did not want to count the months, he did not want to know. Her disgust for him after the accident still hurt, deep down. With time Nick had managed to push that episode in a corner of his mind. A dusty corner which did not get many visits...but it was for the best. Last summer felt like another lifetime. In a way, it was. Sometimes Nick thought that he had been thrown into someone else’s nightmare, with no traces of the old Nick, the pre-crash Nick, the walking Nick. And it bugged him because he ‘was’ that Nick. The disabled Nick did not fit into the equation. He did not belong to this lifetime. It was nothing but a mistake. Fate was playing a nasty trick on him. It had shuffled all the cards and Nick had been given the wrong ones. He had a much better hand before, so what had happened ? Why him ? Why ‘that’ ? Because he had confessed his love for George ? If so, it was a damned high price to pay. How he wished he could go back in time. Not just to prevent the accident. Of course, if he could, he would. He would be foolish not to try. But above all, he would hold his tongue and not declare his flame to George as it had been the starting point of his misery. George, his George, his beautiful George, the only woman he had feelings for. She was his forbidden fruit. And temptation was always round the corner and so hard to resist: how many times did he bump into George at the Mill in only a week ? How long could he still...
Once home, Nick sighed heavily. The atmosphere of his home had always had a soothing effect on him. Whenever Nick had a tough day at work or a frustating session at St Phil’s, he would come back home and, with the help of a few beers, relax and forget about the day’s events. Tonight was no exception. Although work and physio had gone well, extremely well in fact, Nick felt a bit down. Since that fateful night before Christmas, he had tried to fight the depression that was settling in, shake it off like a bad headache. George was right: he could not move on with his life if he kept such a negative state of mind. It was destructive. Depression had pushed him to isolate himself a bit more each time that he had refused any kind of help from anyone. Old and new friendships alike had suffered because of it. Nick thought of Sally...Belle...George. Back to George. Again. It was an obsession. In order to regain her friendship, he was determined not to repeat the errors of the past. He had made enough of them to last a lifetime, as he had told Ronnie back in the days when they were friends. Ronnie...another lost friendship. Ronnie who had punched him but never known that he had triggered Nick’s recovery. It was so ironic: instead of the intended punishment, Ronnie had done Nick a favour. Nick knew he had been lucky. Hence his promise to himself to get better. Both physically and mentally. Nick shook his head to clear his mind. Gone were his days of doom and gloom, replaced by an optimism which had been the order of the day for quite a while now. His goal required all his focus and energy, and beyond.
The End.
As usual, a big thank you to Bella for correcting my English and being patient with me. And God knows she has to be! ;D
Afternoon surgery had seemed to drag on forever. Nick did not have any cancellations and he could not enjoy more than a five-minute break. Even worse, Vivien had booked in some extra patients for him. Deep inside he knew that it was only fair, to his patients and colleagues alike, as he had been away earlier in the afternoon and would be again tomorrow. He did not really mind as long as it enabled him to have the following day off. Inbetween patients and their numerous aches and pains, Nick just hoped that his luck would not leave him. His life was now back on track, both on a personal and professional level, and he intended to do whatever it would take to keep it that way. At that precise moment, the idea of George smiling when she would see him walk into the staff room sprang into his mind. He quickly dismissed the image as he needed to stay focused on the task at hand. George would see him walk, just not yet. She would be relieved of her guilt, he swore to himself. This was part of his motivation. Nick would never admit it to George of course, or anyone else for that matter, but her guilty feelings had started to make him feel uneasy. Not guilty in turn, just uneasy. He hated to see George so miserable. He craved for the return of the gorgeous, sparkling George whom he loved so much. This had kept him going in his bleakest hours.
The ride home was one of Nick’s favourite times for thinking. Those minutes were his and his only. No interruptions of any kind: no colleagues, no patients, no need to pay attention to what was going on on the road as he was no longer a driver, no chit chat from the cabby. It was just him and his thoughts. The image of George was still present in his mind. No matter how hard he tried, he could not stop thinking about her. He loved her, always had and always would. Ronnie was the luckiest man on earth but he did not seem to realise it. Nick envied him: he would do anything, absolutely anything at all, to get a woman like George. Sadness cast a shadow over Nick’s face. Women... He did not know any woman crazy enough to choose a cripple for boyfriend. The idea seemed ludicrous. Women were nothing but a faint memory now. How long had it been since Gabby had left him ? He did not want to count the months, he did not want to know. Her disgust for him after the accident still hurt, deep down. With time Nick had managed to push that episode in a corner of his mind. A dusty corner which did not get many visits...but it was for the best. Last summer felt like another lifetime. In a way, it was. Sometimes Nick thought that he had been thrown into someone else’s nightmare, with no traces of the old Nick, the pre-crash Nick, the walking Nick. And it bugged him because he ‘was’ that Nick. The disabled Nick did not fit into the equation. He did not belong to this lifetime. It was nothing but a mistake. Fate was playing a nasty trick on him. It had shuffled all the cards and Nick had been given the wrong ones. He had a much better hand before, so what had happened ? Why him ? Why ‘that’ ? Because he had confessed his love for George ? If so, it was a damned high price to pay. How he wished he could go back in time. Not just to prevent the accident. Of course, if he could, he would. He would be foolish not to try. But above all, he would hold his tongue and not declare his flame to George as it had been the starting point of his misery. George, his George, his beautiful George, the only woman he had feelings for. She was his forbidden fruit. And temptation was always round the corner and so hard to resist: how many times did he bump into George at the Mill in only a week ? How long could he still...
Once home, Nick sighed heavily. The atmosphere of his home had always had a soothing effect on him. Whenever Nick had a tough day at work or a frustating session at St Phil’s, he would come back home and, with the help of a few beers, relax and forget about the day’s events. Tonight was no exception. Although work and physio had gone well, extremely well in fact, Nick felt a bit down. Since that fateful night before Christmas, he had tried to fight the depression that was settling in, shake it off like a bad headache. George was right: he could not move on with his life if he kept such a negative state of mind. It was destructive. Depression had pushed him to isolate himself a bit more each time that he had refused any kind of help from anyone. Old and new friendships alike had suffered because of it. Nick thought of Sally...Belle...George. Back to George. Again. It was an obsession. In order to regain her friendship, he was determined not to repeat the errors of the past. He had made enough of them to last a lifetime, as he had told Ronnie back in the days when they were friends. Ronnie...another lost friendship. Ronnie who had punched him but never known that he had triggered Nick’s recovery. It was so ironic: instead of the intended punishment, Ronnie had done Nick a favour. Nick knew he had been lucky. Hence his promise to himself to get better. Both physically and mentally. Nick shook his head to clear his mind. Gone were his days of doom and gloom, replaced by an optimism which had been the order of the day for quite a while now. His goal required all his focus and energy, and beyond.
The End.